Self-awareness is the act of becoming conscious about your thoughts, emotions and actions and if they are in line with your values and how you would want to see yourself. We often act in ways that contradict what we hold dear to ourselves and becoming aware of them can lead to living more congruent and fulfilling lives. Here are some steps to go about it:
· Prepare for introspection – Getting yourself ready to uncover things about yourself can be nerve-wracking, so it’s important to ensure that you are comfortable when you do. Pick your favourite time or space, somewhere where you can feel free to express yourself however you would want with no one to ask questions. This could include sitting with your journal, going for a walk, after your morning coffee or before your exercise routine.
· Look for patterns – Start by setting goals as to what you want to understand more of. Is it your relationships, your work, your temperament? When you get an idea of what you want to explore, reflect on past instances regarding it, including your thoughts, feelings and reactions to the situations. You will slowly uncover themes and how you generally handle them.
· Stay with the feeling – Discovering patterns can be quite unsettling. And it usually leads to ignoring the feeling because of how uncomfortable it can get to manage. Our challenge to you, however, is to stay with it. When an emotion pops up, try understanding what it’s trying to tell you. Emotions are signals, even the painful ones. They give us insight into what we need more, or less of. What comes up for you?
· Share your findings – When you have found things about yourself, you may benefit from sharing it with a trusted person like a friend, family member, mentor or therapist. They should be people that look out for you, do not judge, want you to grow and are accepting of you. See what they have to say about your discovery and if there is truth to it. Together, you can explore it deeper and find healthy ways to navigate through it.
· Search out alternatives – As you discover things about yourself, you may discover things that are unhealthy or something you wish to change. This could involve ways of coping, your reactions in situations or your thought patterns that leave you more distressed than hopeful. Look for things you can do that are healthy and encourage your growth. For accountability, you can let someone in on what you want to do for yourself.