Everything about the holidays focuses on maximizing happiness. Some of the associations we have to them are gifts, vacations, weddings, family get-togethers etc. As a result, it also creates the pressure to feel only happy around the holidays, even if we’re going through a tough time personally. Here are some things to keep in mind if the stress of the holidays get to you:
1. Focus on what’s important to you – The holidays could mean prioritizing different things for different people. It could be spending time with loved ones, spending quality time with oneself, connecting with one’s faith or exploring new places and cultures. Think about where you would like to focus your efforts and make the most of it this season!
2. Release obligation to be a certain way – Your aunt tells you to lose weight, you get compared to your third cousin who just got a promotion or to your neighbour who’s getting married soon – holiday 101. Remember that just because people give you their opinions or compare you to others, it doesn’t mean that you need to fit their expectations of you. You are allowed to be your own person, go on your own journey that may not resemble another’s, and be perfectly content with where you are at.
3. Be firm with your boundaries – Being around people also means receiving uninvited comments about your life. Learn what works best for your dynamics with the person – it could be engaging in healthy discussion, choosing not to say anything, stating what you will not accept as comments or simply walking away. Do what makes you the most comfortable and if the comments or behaviours persist, focus on taking care of yourself.
4. Plug into your resources – This time can be very stressful for a lot of us. Identify the things that can make you feel more like yourself and comfortable. It can be overwhelming to deal with planning, finances or those around you. Find self care activities that can help you deal with these feelings better like taking a walk in nature, listening to calming music, playing with art, etc.