Resilience is the ability to endure and cope with big life stressors and difficulties. It involves having the mental capacity to handle tough situations so that one is more capable to get through them and return to feelings of normalcy quicker. Here are some ways to build a more resilient foundation:
i. Self-compassion – Be aware of how much you can take. We are not meant to have it all under control and keep our emotions in check. Sometimes we need to take a break from keeping a strong front and let out some steam. Give yourself the room to grow through kindness, acceptance and gentle nudges in the right direction rather than critique.
ii. Rely on resources – Being resilient does not mean going through life alone. Invite trusted others into your journey – the ones that do not mind hearing your story for the nth time or make you feel like you are being a burden. Asking for help is not an indicator of weakness, rather it demonstrates strength and courage to be vulnerable.
iii. Remember what worked before – Look at events in your life that took place before all the ‘highs’ and after all the ‘lows’. For example, perhaps prior to achieving a scholarship to college or entry to your current job, there would be a lot of hard work and pushing through that went into getting there. Or perhaps your happiness in a current relationship might have happened after a period of grief and heartbreak. Remember how you dealt with those trying circumstances and give yourself a clue on how you can get through the current situation. Make a timeline of your life, highlighting the different milestones you have passed through and acknowledge what it took to get there.
iv. Visualize the end goal – Having an end goal can create meaning in your life. By focusing your attention on the end goal, one can navigate through challenges with more ease. It can be something with concrete steps like getting a PhD or something abstract like working on your self-esteem.